It's giving "let's act the fuck up..."
It's 20:02 PST, May 26th, and there's a New Moon in Gemini
Hey sluts,
“The Good, The Bad, and Everything In-between” is a lunar horoscope of the monthly variety. Why lunar? Well, simply put, the Moon is for the people. And, most importantly, the Moon is for the streets. If you’re looking for musings ridden with purple language and astrological DIY, look here. My goal is to be as unclear and unruly as possible. The world’s already so . . . meh. Maybe this will help? Today’s forecast is giving “let’s act the fuck up.”
Sincerely,
E.Y. Washington
The Good: Ah, yes. Gemini. The Sign of Loud Mouths, Gum Bappers, Teeth Typers, and Tongue Flappers. Astros of yore groaned at the thought of the Moon in Gemini. Apparently, Mercury’s whimsical abode turns the Moon into a crackhead straight out of the Tyler Perry Cinematic Universe. (I’m not being hyperbolic. Check Al-Burni’s translation yourself. And, while we’re on the subject, he also said the Moon governs stupidity. No comment.) An incredibly inquisitive lunation, Gemini Moons ensure a thought-provoking, excitable, silly-serious vibe. I look forward to the time spent under these fact-checking stars. Co-present with Mercury and Jupiter, the young and babbling lunation fosters a critical and connective kind of commotion. When I use the word commotion, I mean to invoke its etymological connotation which is to say coming together and making a ruckus. Well behaved women rarely make history. So, let’s start get off the internet, run our mouths in the wild, and act the fuck up.
The Bad: Lately, I’ve been eyeing Mars and Saturn quite optimistically. Both baddies are caught up in Leo and Aries right now, egging on the verbose little Moon. Sixty degrees away, the Harbingers of Aggression and Rejection are sweetly received. Combative yet constructive, they offer avenues of support that air on the side of “don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty; you’re well within your right to do so.” Whether that’s “good or bad” is entirely up to you. To make matters more enticing, Venus in Aries ups the ante and sweetens the pot. So much risk, so much reward. Tread carefully, toots. We are under deeply enabling skies.
Everything Else In-between: Over in Aquarius, Pluto plots methodically and Mercury is suspiciously agreeable. Their conversation makes me a bit uneasy. Generally speaking, what’s done in the dark comes to the light. What, I wonder, will they dig up. Meanwhile, in the first degrees of Aries, Neptune feeds Saturn’s feverish delusions about establishing order. He’s hasty here and I’m curious whether or not a new kind of unimaginable lawlessness will abound. Lastly, after spending a considerable amount of time with Uranus, Mercury is barely recovering from a rather destabilizing panic attack. I can’t imagine rabble rousing Uranus didn’t share his eyebrow raising plans with Heaven’s Twinky Articulator. I know they certainly induced anxieties. Uranian endgames restructure rather than do away with hierarchies. I wonder whether or not such radical reordering will help, heal or hinder.
Where is the New Moon bapping its gums for you?
Gemini Risings: 1st House of Me, Myself, and I
Taurus Risings: 2nd House of Bread, Cheddar, Cash, and Green
Aries Risings: 3rd House of Daytrips and Ride or Dies
Pisces Risings: 4th House of Mom and Dad, Grandma and Grandpa
Aquarius Risings: 5th House of Apples to Apples, Netflix and Chill
Capricorn Risings: 6th House of Taking the L
Sagittarius Risings: 7th House of Arm Candy, Beards, Business Partners, and Trophy Wives
Scorpio Risings: 8th House of Uncle Sam, RIP, and Life Insurance Money
Libra Risings: 9th House of Long Distance Calls, Sunday Morning Service, and the HBIC
Virgo Risings: 10th House of Boss Ladies, Pipe Dreams, and Street Cred
Leo Risings: 11th House of Grow Up and Glow Up
Cancer Risings: 12th House of Locked Up They Won’t Let Me Out